Mid Life Melanin MaMa

What If.....

June 7, 2016

I find myself saying more often than not.

"Buy things for the life you have"

Instead of

"Create the life you want"

My friend Meosha says.....

"That's not my life"

Meosha gave me the most beautiful knit off the shoulder sweater. SHE Made THIS STATEMENT.

It got me to wonder. What if we created the life we wanted?

I just now remembered that is exactly what I DID.

From abused house wife and soldier. To Communications Engineering Free spirit. I created the personal/work life I wanted.

I was intentional about creating that life and getting it. Now people say you yes you are such a "free spirit" or "inspiration ". I say the same about Meosha. But we well all of us created this life we have now.

So my question to you is.

What if we created the LIFE WE WANTED?

WE RECREATED OUR NEW FASHION LIVES.

WE CREATED THAT, WE EVOLVED INTENTIONALLY.

SO WHAT IF WE BOUGHT FOR THE LIFE WE WANTED TO CREATE?

ALRIGHT FAMILY LET'S HEAR IT.

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Posted in the Inspiration category
This post is also published in the youlookfab forum. You can read and reply to it in either place. All replies will appear in both places.

18 Comments

  • Windchime replied 7 years ago

    There's wisdom in your suggestion. We can definitely dress (buy) for the life we want to create, which is different than buying for an imaginary life.

    On a separate note, you have a fab photographer! You always post the greatest pictures; someone has a really good eye.

  • Ledonna N. replied 7 years ago

    Hey windchime, what if we wanted our imaginary life to become real?

  • Chris987 replied 7 years ago

    What a fantastic reminder that we can all create the life we want, if not totally then partially.  For some reason this is really resonating with me this morning, thanks for the inspiration LeDonna!  

    Another thing...we have all created the life we have now, either intentionally or not.  Owning up to that is a good first step.

    I have not had enough coffee yet and have not been getting enough sleep lately so no additional words of wisdom at this time.....:-)

  • kimlee replied 7 years ago

    Yes, yes, yes. Three years ago, I took a workshop and one of the activities was to write a letter describing how we envisioned our lives in 3 years from that date. I carry that letter in my planner - and periodically read it. It motivates me to make decisions and choices that move me closer to the life I want.  Do I enjoy the life I am living right now - OF COURSE! But I can  always keep moving forward to craft the life I want !

  • Suz replied 7 years ago

    This is a brilliant idea. I think a lot of us on YLF try to put it into action. I really like Windchime's distinction.

    First step, stop buying for the imaginary life that we will never live (maybe we don't even want that life!) -- that is, the one where we have a closetful of corporate clothes (and don't work for a corporation); have nothing to wear for exercise class (and go there three times a week); have lots of clothes for summer (and live in a winter climate); have clothes that bind or pinch or won't zip up (because we are dressing the body we used to have). 

    Next step, start buying for the life and body you have. 

    Finally, dress as the person you want to become.  

    It involves a great deal of self-knowledge. We have to know what we are aiming for. 

  • replied 7 years ago

    In my imaginary life, I'm a spy that jets off to exotic locales to catch bad guys and bring them to justice.  My black trench coat and stiletto heels (my only weapon besides my black-belt in karate) are always waiting in the closet for when I get the call.  I like to be prepared!  I still need an Aston Martin, though....

  • Ledonna N. replied 7 years ago

    I am reading nodding in agreement and laughing Xtabay

    My work week has been the 9th circle of hell.  Sorry if I don't go all in.  I'll respond later  But I am reading. 

  • replied 7 years ago

    Sorry to hear you're having a hellish week, Ledonna.  Hang in there, Friday housing draws near!  If I get a call to jet off to Singapore or wherever, I'll stop by and pick you up.  Have your fit ready!

  • jill58 replied 7 years ago

    I love this idea Ledonna. Sometimes I don't have any idea why I'm buying something--because it caught my eye--because it will cover a perceived flaw--sometimes, in the past there's been very little cohesion to my purchases. YLF has really made me think about all of this. I think the idea of dressing for the life we want to create is a great guiding principle. One of the things I know I don't want is a closet full of random purchases. What I've had in the past is too many clothes, purchased for a myriad of reasons--never well analyzed. What I do want is more cohesion, fewer items and a wardrobe that supports the person I would like to become.

  • replied 7 years ago

    Sure. At it's very base level, it's the notion behind "dressing for the job you want, not the one you have".  Etc.  If you feel it, you can become it. 

  • Maneera replied 7 years ago

    This really resonates with me too. I think we can all work TOWARDS having the life we want to have. Sadly, the exact picture of where you want to take your life isn't always clear....but the mere idea of "this is NOT what I want for my life" is a good enough starting point.

  • Jane replied 7 years ago

    I'm with Xtabay ... Imagining hunting down spy's acoss the world, running in skinny jeans and heels....

  • dakotacheryl replied 7 years ago

    I feel very blessed that I am so "happy" with my life, husband, family etc. I wish my dear sister lived closer to the Black Hills of South Dakota...but darn it, she has her own family!!

  • Ledonna N. replied 7 years ago

    I've enjoyed reading these responses.

    Windchime -I see the difference in the Imaginary and the life we want. I have a network of pictures takers. Lol.

    Chris wow I agree with purpose or not and admittedly owning our stuff helps.

    KimLee the letter,,that is such a great idea. Do I enjoy the life I am living right now - OF COURSE! But I can always keep moving forward to craft the life I want ! You get it and I feel the same way.

    SUZ sis you broke it down. Amazing t ok read this and to say yes I will not give in to that imaginary life but I can still create what I want.

    Xtabay I've got my fit in standby

    Jill with the help of ylf I got to get rid of the randomness and I've learned to edit my Wadrobe.

    Lisap so true.

    Maneera I think that it's ok not to know but to ensure we are not obsessive in our finding out.

    Jane let's go

    dakotscheryl I'm glad your happy. Sisters are always good. I love mine and am glad she is close.

     

  • rachylou replied 7 years ago

    I hope the idea of intentional evolution will worm its way into my brain. I've got a bush baby brain. Bush babies are those people you see sitting with their goat just staring at you when you travel into the bush...lol.

  • Eliza replied 7 years ago

    Love the post and the responses. In some ways, fashion lets us try out where we may be headed, perhaps before we can articulate ir commit to it.

    We can also use fashion as punctuation in the lives we are living now. Ladonna- those gorgeous photos have some exclamation points in them.

  • replied 7 years ago

    Yes, LeDonna! Such great and wise words. I don't always know where I want my life to go or what I want it to be...need to work on that...but I love the idea of making things happen and setting wheels in motion.

    I hope your week gets better LeDonna...hang in there.

    PS...I want to join Jane and Xtabay! I'll get the Aston Martin ;)

  • Ledonna N. replied 7 years ago

    Rachyloumy brain is pretty foggy most good days so I fully understand. I will just wander around some days. That's when the best things happen. Happy accidents.

    Eliza so true. I think that is why I "Thrift in Time". Hahahahhahahahahah lolohahah get it lolo cracking up at 4 in the morning. Sorry I'm loopy. But then again I am most days.

    Diane it has been a long short week. Probably because I'm sleeping longer that I usually do. Usually I sleep a couple of hours here and there. I think because my life is fuller I'm getting more worn out. Well let's load up the Martin and drive off into the sunset. It is getting better because I get to talk to the Fam. amd good things happen everyday. I'm so happy I started this blog.

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I'm a 44 year old Mid Life Melanin MaMa with my beautiful daughter who just entered her toddler years. I hope you will join us honor fashionable and Thrifty Adventures. As we discover a life that is full of fashionable color and joy. We hope to inspire you, make you think, but most importantly make you smile. So I invite you to Journey with us on this thing we call life.